I Coach Disruptors ⚠️ Here Are Signs You're One Of Them 🛑
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Calm down.
Don’t be so emotional.
You’re overreacting.
You’re too intense.
All of these comments make my blood boil. Because I know internally these comments are meant to silence me, to make me smaller, tone me down, or control me. I’ve been told these things all my life. Growing up as an empathic kid, one who felt emotional overwhelm when someone was mistreated, I tended to speak up or ask questions to understand why the world was the way it was. And not everyone was comfortable with that.
But as I grew into my teenage years and young adulthood, I did what most people do; I molded to the comments and I consciously or subconsciously agreed to the judgments or gaslighting (we didn’t have that term growing up, btw). I think I submitted to keep myself safe from harm or from being ostracized.
But over time, as my career developed, I realized the choice to be silenced cost me my voice and my agency. Because I was outspoken, it cost me jobs. I literally was pushed out of positions because I was pointing out unethical practices and institutional racism with my higher-ups. This happened twice.
Now that I think about it, as I was building up my leadership, I really didn’t have role models for my rage. Coaching wasn’t a thing offered for professional development, and most of what was out there were diversity programs; aka, failed attempts to have us conform to the status quo, white supremacy culture in the workplace.
I wish I had the language, rhetoric, and supportive environments that embraced my fiery nature instead of teaching me how to be more likable.
So, how did I end up finding my voice/agency and embracing my natural rage? TBH, I had to reach outside of my professional career and resources and start working on myself on a personal level. I couldn’t have come to the place I’m in now, fully on my path as a coach, healer, and facilitator, had I not stretched myself to go into spiritual development.
Now that I’ve blended all parts of my leadership into my coaching style, I realized that I tend to have clients who resemble a lot of who I am and what I’ve gone through in life. I guess you can say it’s the way that my life lessons are now available to share and support others on a similar path!
To fully accept myself I had to come to terms with my identity as a DISTRUPTOR. Once I did that I felt more whole, more complete in my identity. And I started to notice how my clients tended to be disruptors themselves! Suddenly I can recognize the rage, the frustration, and support them in a way that celebrates and empowers the change agents they are (without them losing their jobs, of coarse)!
So, over these last 9 years of working with leaders 1:1, I noticed the traits below as the
DISRUPTOR ARCHETYPE.
Are you one of them? How many can you say "yes" to?
Stands firm on beliefs of justice and truth: They are willing to risk positions of power to advocate for what they believe is right, acting as altruists of truth and universal law.
Possesses powerful, often unseen accomplishments: Their past successes are not public but serve as a "secret weapon," providing a high moral ground from which they operate.
Highly aware, empathic, and educated on societal dysfunction: They understand the root causes of problems and are fierce advocates for solutions that align with nature and universal/natural law.
Needs balance and deep human connection: Despite their fiery nature, they crave validation, human-centered relationships, and deeper connections to prevent burnout.
Looks to nature for validation and guidance: They believe nature holds the answers for healing and "setting things right," trusting it to guide their approach to change.
If you answered yes to all, let’s flip the script on what it means to be a disruptor and make changes in our organizations without losing a job, having fallouts in relationships, or feeling alone and “too much” of anything. You’re more than enough, you’re meant to do this work!
My private 1:1 spaces are here to accept and witness ALL of you, to nurture and embrace all the rage you've been containing. Despite what your external environment tells you about who you should be, you already know who you are in all the heightened emotions that come up when in the face of injustices. Let's get to the root of your beliefs and how you see the world doing better, being better for the sake of the collective shift towards right relationship with each other. Let's work together to find a more effective way as you contribute on the frontlines!
Let’s find a time on my calendar to talk about ways you can cultivate your leadership THROUGH your rage and characteristic of being a DISRUPTOR!
